Tom Brady Is Not Human But You Already Knew That Since He Just Won His Seventh Super Bowl

 

    It's oddly reassuring in a world where very few things have gone right in the last 11 months that 43-year-old quarterback Tom Brady can change teams for the first time, go to a league doormat and still somehow deliver a Super Bowl title in his first year with the Buccaneers. The first team to ever host the biggest single game in sports capped off a masterful postseason with their best effort yet as they blasted the defending champion Chiefs 31-9. I can't imagine that New England head coach Bill Belichick had the stomach to watch this entire contest since Brady (21-of-29 for 201 yards, 3 TDs) threw all his touchdowns in the first half and they were all caught by other former Patriots: two to tight end Rob Gronkowski (team-leading 6 catches, 67 yards) and one to degenerate receiver Antonio Brown. From there, the Bucs cruised to a 21-6 halftime advantage and eventually their first Super Bowl crown since 2003. Brady continued to extend his own mind-boggling records with his seventh title and fifth Super Bowl MVP award to boot. Haha but is that elite though?

    Plenty of people believed that Tampa could pull out a close win but absolutely nobody saw this defensive domination coming from the home team as they forced Chiefs superstar quarterback Patrick Mahomes into the worst game of his brilliant pro career: 26-of-49 for 270 yards, 0 TDs, 2 INTs. Here's a great stat: Mahomes is 6-0 in his young postseason career vs the rest of the NFL & 0-2 vs Brady who also knocked him off in the AFC Championship Game in Kansas City two years ago. The scary part for the rest of the league is that A) Brady confirmed after the game ended that he'll be back for at least another season and B) the Buccaneers' roster is stacked and mostly pretty young so they are not going anywhere anytime soon. For all the great things that Belichick has done with the Pats, letting TB12 go is quickly tearing up the charts for one of the worst decisions in pro sports history. Did I mention that the Brady victory tour returns to Gillette Stadium next season for what should be an insanely anticipated game? Fingers crossed that fans can be safely allowed back in the stands by then.  

    Brady has long been the greatest football player in history (don't bother debating that fools) but now he's entering even more rarified air with this title that nobody could have predicted before the Bucs started rolling in the postseason and knocking off three former MVPs (Drew Brees, Aaron Rodgers and Mahomes) along the way. He will rightfully be included in discussions with Michael Jordan for the best professional athlete that has ever lived. If you wrote a book or screen play about Tom Brady's life, it would be hard enough to believe but this new Tampa Bay chapter makes it simply incredible. If there were any stragglers left, it also settles the two pertinent questions that we always wondered about: 1) could TB12 win elsewhere?; 2) Who was more important: him or Bill? Finally, say it with me folks: he is not simply a systems quarterback. 

The Patriots Actually Hung Around With The Chiefs Way Longer Than Expected But Still Lost 26-10

 

    Once word came over on Saturday morning that Cam Newton had Covid-19 and he would miss the much-anticipated early season showdown against the Chiefs (4-0), a tall task turned into an impossible one. Let's be clear here: nobody in the world expected the Patriots (2-2) to compete with the defending Super Bowl champions so I suppose they should be proud of their effort under really tough circumstances: no Newton, the game moved to Monday night and they flew to KC this morning. Still, the NFL is not a participation trophy type of league and football isn't that kind of sport for that matter so the bottom line is that the Chiefs won 26-10 this evening at Arrowhead Stadium. 

    Brian Hoyer (15-of-24 for 130 yards, 1 INT, 59.4 QB rating) got the fluke start for the Pats but he didn't finish the outing as Jarrett Stidham (5-of-13 for 60 yards, 1st NFL TD pass, 2 INTs, 39.4 QB rating) took over in the third quarter and went the rest of the way. If Cam didn't have the Coronavirus, Hoyer honestly could be cut tomorrow and I don't think anyone would bat an eye. He came in with 10 straight losses in games that he'd started so it makes you wonder, how is he still in the NFL?  This should have been Stidham's first career NFL start but after a rough training camp complete with a mysterious hip injury, he was relegated to third-string quarterback duties-inactive the first three weeks. Thanks to the game getting pushed back a day, it will be a short week for the Patriots as they host the Broncos (1-3) on Sunday afternoon (4:25, CBS) and if Newton remains out, I'm calling it now: Stidham should/will start in his place. 

    The Patriots defense deserved better since they held one of the most explosive offenses in the league to just 19 points (KC's other touchdown was a pick-6 by Tyrann Mathieu) on their home turf with some fans (22%) in the stands. The best quarterback in the universe Patrick Mahomes (19-for-29, 236 yards, 2 TDs, 113.6 QB rating) looked mortal since both of his "touchdown passes" were 6-yard fancy handoffs to Tyreek Hill (4 catches, 64 yards) and Mecole Hardman. Kansas City's star tight end Travis Kelce (3 catches, 70 yards) still has never recorded 100+ receiving yards vs. the Patriots which is amazing and New England held explosive rookie running back Clyde Edwards-Helaire to under 100 total yards (64 rushing, 27 receiving). The Pats lost from self-inflicted wounds that resulted in three more turnovers (4-1).

    There were three plays in particular that will give Pats head coach Bill Belichick nightmares for weeks: a possible Mahomes fumble in the second quarter was incorrectly whistled dead for a sack, Hoyer got sacked on the last play of the first half which blew a chance at a tying field goal for New England and Stidham's pick-6 clanged off of Julian Edelman's (3 catches on 6 targets for 35 yards) usually money hands. It was such a bizarre set of circumstances leading up to this postponed contest so I feel like once the Chiefs saw that Cam was out, they figured this was a lock and who could blame them? That's why I wouldn't take too much out of this result which was closer than the final score would indicate. 

    There were some positives for the Patriots, thankfully the trip was not a complete waste of their collective time (haha easy for me to say sitting in the comfort of my own living room while I write this). Their red zone defense was great in the first half as they held Kansas City to a pair of Harrison Butker field goals (from 23 yards and 39 yards) and they forced a fumble by Sammy Watkins that was recovered by J.C. Jackson (who later should have had an interception). You knew that to have any chance to be competitive, they needed to run the ball well and they piled up nearly 200 rushing yards: with Sony Michel placed on IR (quad) earlier in the day, Damien Harris (17 carries, 100 yards) had his first career 100-yard performance in the NFL and James White (38 yards receiving and 21 yards rushing) returned to action after missing the last two games following his father's tragic death in a car accident. Wide receiver Damiere Byrd (5 catches, 80 yards) had his second solid game as a Patriot and Chase Winovich (2 solo tackles, 2 assists) notched a sack for the third straight game. 

    The Patriots got on the board with a 43-yard field goal by Nick Folk in the second quarter. It should have been at least tied 6-6 at halftime but Hoyer gonna Hoyer. With that in mind, he blew another rare red zone opportunity for the Pats by fumbling away the ball in the third quarter which led to Belichick finally benching him. Kansas City took advantage by turning that mistake into seven points on Hill's touchdown late in the third quarter which gave the home team a 13-3 lead. We saw a brief glimpse of what got all the beat writers in a lather about Stidham this summer when he tossed a perfect 4-yard fade in the corner of the end zone to N'Keal Harry. The Chiefs answered that score with a touchdown of their own-Hardman's-but Butker missed the PAT so it was 19-10. It was game over one play later though as Mathieu took Edelman's baffling drop 25 yards for the clinching touchdown. 

    It is useless predicting anything in 2020 but I can guarantee that this week leading up to what should be a layup against the terrible Broncos will be full of intrigue over A) Cam's availability or B) who will start if he remains sidelined. Denver just got their first win of the season on Thursday night 37-28 at the hapless Jets (0-4). They've had plenty of quarterback issues of their own as starter Drew Lock is out with a shoulder injury, backup Jeff Driskel already got the hook and third-string undrafted rookie Brett Rypien of course was the one to start and beat the Jets. Linebacker Von Miller and wide receiver Courtland Sutton-their two best players-are out for the season with injuries and their head coach is the immortal Vic Fangio. Week 6 is New England's bye week so given the weak opponent and with time to regroup on the horizon, this is a game they have to win no matter which quarterback gets the nod. Plus not for nothing but Buffalo (4-0) is two games up on second-place New England as the Patriots bid for their 12th straight AFC East title looks to be a legitimate battle for once.