I might be unemployed but if Boston Celtics head coach Doc Rivers feels like stepping down at any point this season, I think I'm the man to take his place. Proving that your favorite blogger knows his hometown teams, I suggested last week after losing in New Orleans that Rivers should shake up his lineup with the only possible solution: replacing zombie Jermaine O'Neal with rookie Greg Stiemsma.
Five days later, Doc must have read my post since today he made the switch when O'Neal sat out with some old man injury (sore hamstring/broken dentures). Stiemsma's presence helped spark Boston (3-3) to its third straight win and second in as many nights against the Washington Wizards (0-5), 100-92 at TD Garden.
Don't be surprised if the Wizards are the worst team in the Eastern Conference this season or maybe even the entire league, they are that awful. Washington is the only winless team remaining in the NBA.
Before training camp, I can honestly say that I had never heard of Stiemsma. Truth be told, looking at pictures from his college days at Wisconsin, I remember him (which is saying something since everyone on the Badgers looks exactly the same). It tells you something about O'Neal that The Steamer is already better and more consistent than him at this juncture.
In 21 minutes, Stiemsma had 13 points, seven rebounds, two assists and two blocks. He provides energy and a defensive presence that the Celts lack without him protecting the rim. Plus, it allows New England to embrace its racist roots. We always need a white scrub to root for on the C's-somewhere Brian Scalabrine weeps.
So while O'Neal and Kevin Garnett (10 points, 6 rebounds, 6 assists) age in dog years, Ray Allen continues to defy all logic and not get older at all. Remember when everyone wanted to trade him a few seasons ago? Well it turns out ol' Ray is still the best shooter in the NBA. This evening he had a team-high 27 points including an absurd 6 of 7 on 3-pointers. His prego wife was loving it, proving that he's accurate off the floor as well. Rim shot!
Paul Pierce added a season-high 21 points in his third game and Rajon Rondo had 13 assists (7 turnovers), seven rebounds and six points. Brandon Bass continued to be excellent off the bench for Boston with 14 points and six rebounds.
Andray Blatche, who is a fat slug, put up a game-high 28 points and nine rebounds based mostly on long jumpers and free throws. If you know a more soft and less motivated big guy than him (that's American and not European), I'd be shocked.
JaVale McGee (17 points, 14 rebounds, 3 blocks) had another nice performance against the Celts. His length and athleticism really gives them trouble, it's a shame he's on a currently hopeless team. John Wall had 11 points and eight assists (7 turnovers) while Nick Young scored 10 points on a brutal shooting night (3 of 14).
Boston's bench outscored Washington's 21-17 thanks to Bass and Marquis Daniels (7 points).
Predictably on the second night of a back-to-back, against the same opponent, it was close the whole way. The Celtics won because they hit seven more 3-pointers (10-3) and shared the basketball (28-14 assists). The Wizards made five more free throws (19-14), had seven more steals (10-3), six more blocks (10-4), six more fast break points (17-11) and 12 more points in the paint (50-38).
Washington head coach Flip Saunders, who I nominate for the worst coach in the NBA, was ejected for arguing about a non-call 1:44 into the game. He doesn't deserve to get paid for this game, seriously. He probably just wanted more time to style his sweet lax bro hair.
Washington led 24-23 after one quarter and 48-47 at halftime. The Wizards were up 70-69 heading into the fourth but the winless team wasn't able to notch its first win of 2011-12. Boston took it home with a 31-22 last frame.
Another patsy comes to town on Wednesday night as the New Jersey Nets (1-5), who are about as bad as Washington, visit the Celtics. It should be another win for the Green which will tell us absolutely nothing about them. The only aspect of it that interests me is seeing how my guy Marshon Brooks (rookie from Providence College) does for the Nets. He's been putting up nice numbers off their bench so far.
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1 comment:
Blatche makes me want to wretch. He really is the laziest big man in the league...if I was a Wizards fan, I'd start a petition to have a 200-push-up-a-day clause shoved right up his contract. The luckiest and flabbiest 28 points you'll ever see in your life.
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